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Watch Out! These Red Flags Will Tell If Your Partner Isn’t the One for You
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Everyone dreams of falling in love. We all want to find the right partner with whom we get to spend the rest of our life with. However, not all couples end up having a happy ever after ending. Oftentimes, most relationships end in a devastating breakup for various reasons.
How can you make sure that your partner is the right one for you? While there’s no definitive answer to determine if someone is the right one for you, the University of Miami Professor Berit Brogaard shared these warning flags that show your current partner might not be the one.
You and Your Partner Have Different Core Values
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Antonio Guillem/Shutterstock
according to Prof Brogaard, your core values are non-negotiable.
While partners may need to adjust some of their traits and lifestyle to align it with your significant other and have a harmonious relationship, Prof Brogaard says there’s a limit to how much you can compromise. She says that your core values are non-negotiable.
Therefore, your relationship could be in trouble if your partner doesn’t feel the same way. For example, you may want to get married and start your family soon, while your partner doesn’t plan on having children. This clash of core values will result in more conflicts and arguments with your partner.
These fights may bring unpleasant feelings to your and your partner, causing you to be dissatisfied in your relationship. While it’s still possible to change your core values in rare cases, Brogaard says it should be done as a result of personal growth, not because you feel pressured or threatened to change.
They Take You For Granted
If you find your partner either not caring about you at all, or if he or she is calling all the shots in your relationship and didn’t bother to ask for your opinion, then your relationship isn’t well-balanced. A 2013 study revealed that most couples start taking their partners for granted when they reach the third year of their relationship or marriage.
Aside from that, Prof Brogaard warns that showing a submissive behavior towards your partner is a red flag of an unhealthy relationship.
They Don’t Respect
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fizkes/Shutterstock
A renowned psychologist Dr. Peter Gray, said love alone isn’t enough to build a good relationship. It should be accompanied by trust and mutual respect.
A good relationship calls for equality and mutual respect. You shouldn’t treat your partner as a possession or an inferior/superior. You should be treated with dignity and respect as you would give to another human being.
However, if you feel like your partner doesn’t respect you at all, doesn’t listen to your opinions, or calls you derogatory names, then it’s a red flag that she or he isn’t the right one for you. According to Prof Brogaard, this lack of respect can lead to dangerous situations like physical, emotional, and verbal abuse, and being submissive or dominant in a relationship.
She says a partner should never make you question your worth and purpose in life. A right partner should let you overcome your flaws and nourish your strengths and assets to achieve your best potential.
They Don’t Care About Your Intimacy and Emotional Needs
Some partners are afraid to bond with their significant other out of fear of being clingy and needy in their relationship. However, Prof Brogaard says there’s nothing wrong with being clingy once in a while. Being in a relationship means you sometimes need to feel loved by your partner.
You’re vying for your partner’s attention and love as an assurance. Bonding with your partner can help strengthen your relationship and keep your love burning. Intimacy is also needed to express your love through physical contact.
If you find your partner ignoring your emotional and intimate needs consistently, then it’s a signal that there’s something wrong in your relationship. It’s possible he or she isn’t satisfied enough that they don’t want to associate or bond with your anymore.
Take Without Giving Back
You find yourself always thinking about your partner’s feelings and welfare, but is your partner doing the same thing for you? If it isn’t, then something must be wrong in your relationship. A relationship needs a balance of giving and taking for it to work.
It won’t work out if you keep on giving everything you have until you’re left with nothing while your partner doesn’t bother to give back.
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