Ways To Break Free From Negative Thoughts In A Relationship

When your partner comes late from work, you often assume he is neglecting you. If your partner doesn’t remember your special day, you think you are not important to them anymore. If they seem distracted at the dinner table, you think they are bored and not interested in talking to you. Negative thoughts like these appear in a relationship when you feel insecure.

Such thoughts can pave the way to rumination and distort your perception of your partner. As these thoughts build up, perceptions get blurred, and you stop sharing and opening up with your partner. The love that was once present in your relationship starts to fade.

Vera/Pexels | Negative thoughts make things worse

Alicia Munoz is a therapist who suggests that overthinking destroys love in a relationship. After her difficult experience of suffering from rumination and divorce, she believes that love stories are to be created; they don’t just happen. Her book “Stop Overthinking Your Relationship” offers all the strategies couples can use to spark love, satisfaction, and trust back in their relationship.

Don’t Play the Blame Game

Blaming the partner revokes past events and makes it impossible to heal the new wound. You might be sure you are treated unfairly and misunderstood but you may let it be. You may not think too much about it right away and let the matter cool down.

RODNAE productions/Pexels | Getting trapped in the rumination cycle may drive you away from your partner

Control Negative Thought

Control your thoughts from orbiting around bad outcomes. Instead, it’s best to sit with your partner, therapist, or parent and do an emergency meeting related to your future expectations. Your partner should know what you expect of him so that tension, inflexibility, and mistrust disappear from the relationship.

Never Fall Into Self-Pity 

Self-pity revolves around negative thoughts by embracing the role of a victim. Playing victim may inspire your partner to rescue you from this feeling. Avoid self-pitying as your partner may feel controlled and lose his temper on your behavior.

Worry Solves Nothing

When you worry, you get in panic mode, and you start to think of the worst scenarios. People worry too much to get themselves prepared for the unseen. Instead, they end up thinking about every possible worst scenario

Never Create Doubts For Present

When you start to doubt your present, everything starts to look blurry. You may seem to make the wrong judgment about choosing a partner, and a future with them may seem impossible. The funny thing is that it’s all in your head; there is no proof of these doubts. Painful self-judgment leads to chronic doubt cycles.

Keira/Pexels | Instead of making false assumptions, it’s best to communicate your expectations to your partner

How To Break From The Rumination Cycle?

Your thoughts may seem real, but your rumination may act as a defense, making your condition worse. But underneath rumination, there is love and care. When you overthink about your partner, you long for their company. You tend to overthink to protect yourself from uncomfortable emotions. To counter rumination, stop yourself from thinking about bad moments.

Direct your attention by relaxing and inquiring in your mind whether what you are thinking is a fact or just an opinion. It could be an assumption too! Breaking free from the cycle of rumination is a long procedure that requires patience, but it’s worth trying to secure the future of your relationship.