Taking Relationships too Fast Could Be Affecting Our Mental Health. And Here’s Why…
Love, we all tend to look for it fast and furious-ly (pun intended) today. Especially if our past relationships were a basket of sour grapes!
The belief that we have to have to find a partner in the shortest time possible is probably an ideology that’s sprung up in the 21st Century.
Let’s face it. Back in the day, our great grand folks only had letters as a means of communication, and probably saw each other once or twice a month if they were lucky!
If a date was set up, being late was not an option. If it was 7 pm on the dot, it was 7 pm. Get there a few minutes late and they were gone!
Fast forward today and the dating game has certainly changed. Months of courtship are now reduced to just weeks of steamy over-the-top texts, phone calls, and snapping of photos on Instagram and Facebook together. How else will the whole world know that the ‘park has been closed’? *wink*wink
The Hollywood Games
In fact, we don’t even need to go far, just take a look at some of our celebrities here in Hollywood. A good example is the once proverbial bad boy now gone good Justin Bieber.
Heck, he proposed and got engaged to Hailey Baldwin after just a month of dating!
Barely a month after Justin and Hailey’s engagement, ring ring, we get an update that another celebrity couple has joined the show!
Yes people, in August, we were treated to the news that Nick Jonas had popped the question to Priyanka Chopra after only 2 months of dating.
Nevertheless, the celebrity couple that shocked the world was no doubt, Pete Davidson and Ariana Grande.
They started dating in May, by June were engaged, and by July the wedding was called off! Frankly speaking, they summarized three years of dating into three months!
A source close to the former couple admitted that the two split because they felt they were taking in too much too soon.
Effects of the Honeymoon Phase
According to the clinical director of Revive Therapy and Healing Center in Houston, Mrs. Emily deAyala, couples can easily get carried away with the emotions that they are feeling for each other at the beginning of the relationship.
DeAyala continues to explain that the honeymoon phase, which is usually the first phase of a relationship, normally lasts six to eighteen months. During this time frame, individuals can feel very intense and intimate feelings for each other.
Nevertheless, this intensity in emotion, hormones, and neurochemicals during the courtship stage can mask the underlying issues that have never been addressed or resolved.
So when the honeymoon phase comes to an end, and these hormones and chemicals revert to their regular state, problems that have been buried all along resurface, and become more obvious.
Not Addressing Issues During the Honeymoon Phase
Even the simplest things, like once thinking how cute it is that your partners snores now drives you up the wall and you wish you could escape!
DeAyala says that if a couple is able to stay connected and intensify their emotions after the honeymoon phase, this is when they actually begin to experience true intimacy.
However, if such trivial issues arise and the couple is unable to address them, then they can experience a drastic shift from being head over heels for one another to calling it quits can result in a massive dent in their emotional and mental health.
Licensed psychologist in Florida, Miss Rachel Needles says that when such intense positive emotions are altered so quickly, it can culminate in intense negative emotion and stress.
Kind of like a seesaw effect. The higher the seesaw goes, the faster and lower it will crash to the ground.
The Emotional Turmoil After the Breakup
The hurt of having such a promising relationship now blown to smithereens can affect one’s willingness to get into a new one, and chances are high they’ll be emotionally unstable for a while. This will affect their judgment as well as self-esteem.
That being said, handling a breakup is no easy task. Especially during the romantic phase. Nevertheless, DeAyala advises that therapy can be vital in helping you see the experience as a positive one.
In fact, she advises that this is one of the most opportune moments for an individual to work on improving themselves.
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