Relationship Experts Reveal the Ways to Move On From a Breakup
Getting over from a recent breakup isn’t only heartbreaking, but also downright traumatizing for our soul. We find ourselves wondering what went wrong, questioning our self-worth, if we’re enough and worthy to be loved.
Some people also develop an immense fear in committing to a new relationship or finding love again to avoid the pain they’ve gone through. How can you pick up the pieces and make yourself whole again? Here’s what the relationship experts have to say.
Rediscover Your Hobbies, Passion, and Old Interests
What did you love doing before you had a relationship? Are there any hobbies, passions, or goals you’ve dismissed before in favor of pursuing a relationship? If so, this is the right time for you to rekindle your hobbies, interests, and goals. This is the perfect time for you to not only in rediscover yourself, your identity, but also to give time to pursue what makes you happy and fulfilled.
According to Lewandowski, rediscovering yourself through your hobbies and passion enables you to establish your own identity without being dependent on your former partner. His research shows pursuing your dormant interest is a better coping mechanism compared to when you’re trying to discover new things.
According to him, your old interest will give you the sense of comfort and familiarity you need during these down times.
Eliminate the Triggers
Another way to move on easier and quicker is to let go and get rid of anything that’ll remind you of your ex. Be it in the form of pictures, gifts, even your connections and images in the social media, do not hesitate to unfriend them and delete all your memories together.
It may be hard to let go of these things, but you’ll only have a hard time moving on if you still hold on to your false hopes according to the relationship experts. Try to live a different life and establish a different routine now that you’re single. If you went to Starbucks when you were together, opt to go to another coffee shop.
Sever Your Ties
The relationship experts recommend you sever any ties you have with your ex after the breakup. According to Lewandowski, keeping in contact with your partner in hopes of getting back together, staying as friends, or even being civil with each other can only prolong your heartache. If it’s still difficult for you to sever any contact, Lewandowski advises you think of it as your job instead.
The reason why you resign and find a new, better job is because you want to escape from the toxic working environment. You don’t bother to go back to your old job or even think about it since you’re happier in your new life. The same is true in your relationship. If you’re the one who initiated the breakup, Lewandowski advises not to offer any form of reconciliation like being friends again if you don’t mean it because you’re not helping your partner in dealing with pain.
Mingle with Friends
It’s time to catch up with your friends and they’ll be there to support you as you go through this painful stage in your life. The relationship experts reveal you’ll also discover how vast the world is and how blessed you are for having supportive friends who stay loyal to you no matter what happens.
Lewandowski warns against connecting with your ex’s friends, though. He recommends not doing that as it may only prolong your pain and complicate your moving on process.
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